JymalotMusic

What a Year!

I don't think there is enough space on this website to detail all the stuff, good and bad, that's happened since the last time we talked.

First, let's get this Stacie part over with. She's gone. Like a thief, she stole some years from my life (not to mention a car, money, furniture, my favorite gun, etc., loaded up a U-haul and set up house with the maintenance man from her office. "Aye Carumba!," says I. There followed a couple of bad months, but guess what? One day, after talking to Stacie, and recognizing that the person I knew behind those brown eyes was gone, in effect dead to me, well, it got easy, it really did. And I gotta tell you guys, I just don't miss her.

Those fans that got the "Wounded" CD, you knew something was up. Lots of pain in that music (EXPRESSIONS of pain, not as in "painful to listen to," smart aleck). And those fans who have listened to "Change" know that the hole I was in was maybe deep, but not too deep to climb the hell out of. I can truthfully say I even found some joy in the transition.

So, you'll notice we are leaving references and stuff relative to what's-her-name on the website, but only for posterity. As track eight on "Change" reflects, "Here‘s A Wave, So Long."

Okay, enough of that.

The real pain this year was about work, not life. Son-of-a-bitch, do NOT move to Louisiana, and if you do, do NOT work in state government. It is full, top to bottom, of nonsense. Here's a pretend story to illustrate the point….

The head of the agency I work at, he died (RIP). A scramble ensued in terms of who would be appointed by the newly-elected governor to the open position. I was among those scrambling. The governor did nothing, except to allow the number two man in the office to act as the head of the agency. I found out that this acting agency head had a major skeleton in his closet. A couple of years before, he had walked into the office of a young female subordinate, pinned her against the wall, forced his white trash tongue down her throat, yanked up her dress, tore down her panties, stabbed his stubby white trash fingers inside her until she was able to make enough noise that he stopped the attack and fled the room. She immediately made a formal complaint about it. But the incident was covered up, due to the rank and political connections in government which this guy held. He did not miss a minute's work, was not arrested. He was the victim's boss the day before the sexual attack and the day after. The victim got an under-the-table monetary settlement from the culprit, and soon after she left the state.

This is the guy heading up my agency… he should be in prison, not in a job I want. What would YOU do with that information? Well, me, I decided it might help my aspirations (self-serving, I know), and might also help keep the governor from being caught off-guard by a media microphone, if I provided the governor with that info. So, I did. I gave the info in person to a top staffer in the governor's office.

That person immediately removed the bad guy from office and put me, the good whistle-blower, in the agency-head position as a reward for my courage. NOT!!!!!! I'll say that again, as you might be stunned. NOT!!!!!! I was immediately ratted out to the bad guy, who then threatens to beat me to death with a baseball bat, and the process of burying me begins, orchestrated right out of the office of the governor.

THAT was a deep hole. It was waaaay down. After five months of assuredly the heaviest investigation in the history of state government, maybe of Earth, it was discovered I had some naked girl pictures on an old computer. Wow! I guess I should be handcuffed and sent to prison. Maybe I should have sexually attacked a subordinate since nothing happens to you when you do that.

After lawyers weighed in, I agreed to move on at a time of my own choosing. I have to, regardless, as the bull's eye on me is not gonna fade. So, I have not really worked for coming up on a year now. Been on paid leave, which I have tons of. And not working has been great, can I tell ya? That was part of the reason I had time to put together three, count ‘em, three CDs in 2004. Hmmm…. curse or a blessing for you guys? I will, unfortunately, have to go back to work soon. A different state job, with a different agency, but looking forward to it.

Now, let me just remind you that the previous story was pretend, of course, and serves only to illustrate the decadence in government. You understand, right?

And then there came two moments that turned your hero's life around….

The first was when I was home, alone, gonna cook me up a yummy hot dog with some chips for dinner. Awe, man, no buns. Damn! Okay, warm-up pants and a t-shirt, grabbed my wallet and car keys, zipped down to the corner grocery, crowded at 5 p.m., grabbed some buns, stood in line at the counter to pay. It was $1.09. Well, I had $180 in big bills and one $1 bill. So I said to the girl at the register, "Let me run out to my truck, get you some change, so I don't have to break a 20." Ran out, got some change out the truck console, went back in, tossed it on the counter, drove home, ate hot dogs and chips for dinner.

Next morning about 8, I'm up to go eat breakfast (The Warehouse Restaurant in Baton Rouge, great for breakfast, ask for Bridgette, she loves me). I shower, dress, grab the keys, ready to go, no wallet. Where is my wallet? I look everywhere. No wallet. No driver's license, no credit cards, no picture of my kids, no $180. WHERE IS MY WALLET?

And then it hits me. The evening before, at the corner grocery, when I went back out to my truck for the change, I had no pockets in the warm-up pants, so I tossed my wallet on the driver seat of the truck, didn't lock it behind me. Damn! I was only back in the store like 10 seconds. Damn! Some low-life stole my wallet off the seat of my truck. Damn! My wife runs off like a stray dog, politics at work is burying me like underground plumbing, and now my wallet is stolen. It's the one-more-thing that I just don't need, the proverbial straw-that-broke-the-back thing, the flag-for-piling-on, the I-can't-take-it-anymore. A rum and seven with a couple of xanax is not gonna make this okay.

Fuck me, I says. So, I scrape together some quarters from around the house so I can, at least, buy a cup of coffee at breakfast, and head out, in the pouring rain no less, knowing in my heart that there WILL be a police S.W.A.T. team driver's license checkpoint set up to nab me no matter what route I take to get to breakfast. As I pass by the corner grocery, wallowing in depression, I suddenly have a thought. Hey, the store has exterior security cameras! Maybe, if they have not yet recycled the tapes, they might have the piece of shit that took my wallet on video. Yes! I whip the old truck around, head into the parking lot, park, and get out to go inside, hoping for a break.

And as I step out of my truck, a small black square catches my eye. I look closer. There on the ground, where it has lain since 5 p.m. the day before, soaking wet, is Jym's Wallet. You got to be kidding me. I pick it up, and inside there is my license, my cards, my kids' picture and all my money. You got to be kidding me. Do you know how many people have come and gone from this spot since yesterday at 5? Too many for this to be real. But there I stood, in the rain, jaw-dropped and speechless, wallet in hand, face-to-face with a miracle.

You see, I don't have that kind of luck. I don't get those breaks. Never have, never will. What happened was this….. I dropped that wallet, didn't even realize it, and when I did, God saw it, looked around The Control Center, said, "John, Luke, Moses, one of you, see down there, that goofy bald guy? He just dropped his wallet. No big deal, except he's got a lot on his plate right now. He doesn't need this, too. Keep an eye on that wallet, don't let anyone pick it up, and maybe he'll have enough sense to go back tomorrow and check around."

"Yes, my Lord," said John or Luke or Moses. And one of 'em watched over me and my wallet all night until I found it the next day. You know, maybe even God Himself kept one eye on it for me. That's what happened.

And I have not had a day of loneliness since.

Now… as I said there were two moments that turned things around. The second? Well, let's just say I'd do anything for those beautiful green eyes……..